Talking about that again now.
So I'm at my final weeks for my FYP, and I've been staying up late a lot.
What do you do when you do work up late at night?
You EAT.
So I've been snacking like mad. My appetite has been raising exponentially.
I. REALLY. LIKE. EATING. Gosh.
From healthy snacks:
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| My cereal currently. Plus milk. 90% iron bro! |
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| FYI Sour Cream and Onion is my fave flavor of all chips. Finished the large sized bag in 2 days. |
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| There's no bigger image for this biscuit. This is what I have lying around on my kitchen table now. They're so nice! |
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| Indomie rebus. Nuff said. |
And the last one was a full meal! Can't even be categorized into a snack.
Then, this evening I suddenly got this craving for chips and bubble tea. So went down across the street and bought both. Exhale.
I would wonder if I had gained weight. Crossing the 60 kg mark would be so unpleasing.
But I remembered that my first story of weight loss was of God's grace. I did not try AT ALL. I just received it, it just happened. I certainly did not deserve it, looking at the way I was eating at that time.
And it made sense that if the weight loss was by grace in the first place, then the weight maintenance shall also be by grace. That's what I believe.
Sometimes I get so concerned of my appetite. It was HUGE.
And logically, really, I would have gained a lot of weight.
And even though I had a kinda miraculous weight loss story, I would still get worried sometimes, wondering if this time around I would really gain weight.
I know God doesn't change. It's just me being human.
So everytime I get worried, I would remind myself that in the first place, I received my weight loss not by my effort. It has always been God. So why get condemned now when all along it was grace? I ate worse than this in the UK and still God took some 4 kg out of my body!
I would tell myself that God has control over my appetite. He could have reduced it very easily, like in Ghon's story. She lost 8 kg because she just lost the desire of eating. Most food suddenly doesn't interest her. And no effort at all from her side. She just follows her desire. So God works differently for different people.
So yeah, if I have this huge appetite, I believe God is fully aware. And If I know He is watching me, I should just enjoy. So I have never starved myself. When I want to eat, I eat. And after my big meals, sometimes I would rub my tummy and thighs and mumble to myself, "fats go away in Jesus name!" Haha!
So after drinking my bubble tea just now, before my super late dinner at 9.15 pm, I braved myself on the scale. I don't know what to expect. Logically it would reach some 58 kg, but again I live by grace. So I really had no expectation. And really, the number I saw made me happy. ^^
No need to expose what it exactly was, but it was my normal usual weight. Nothing excessive.
So yeah. Grace works!
And again, I am not against healthy eating and exercising or whatever. I believe God gives the will and the work (Phil 2:13.) He gives us the desire, and then He enables us to do it. So if you enjoy exercising and eating veggies makes you happy, very good for you! I exercise too sometimes! Though my definition of exercise would be playing DDR in my room. Standard and Heavy, mind you! So yes, I sweat buckets. And I enjoyed them, so no obligation.
I'm also not promoting you to eat junkfood 24/7 and stuff. Please don't read this and take away anything that is self conscious.
The focus is Jesus. Ask Him to control your appetite. Oh yes, He is able to do that. And then, trust it and enjoy your life!
Good night!
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