Current status:
Mentally and physically tired, but spiritually refreshed.
A friend told me that she realized my status this past few days had been a little down. And I'm amazed she could recognize that cos I've tried my best not to show it online. It's either she's super discerning or it's just me not doing a good enough job.
But yeah. Things had been piling up and maybe I didn't cast it all upon God.
So today we had TLG workers prayer meeting. And I was super tired even to even think of attending. Gosh. And I got Bible Camp meeting and singer practice before that. Not that any of them requires a lot of energy, but just thinking of it is more tiring than actually doing it.
Anyway. As usual, we worshipped before. And it was what I needed. I couldn't care less about what was happening all around me, I only needed God. I sobbed like a baby, quietly, letting it all out.
Maybe lately I've been trying to figure things out on my own. My energy is spent more in my head instead of my body. Everything seems so tiring and frustrating. I realize I didn't spend much time 1 on 1-ing with God.
But then again. Maybe it's just PMS.
Still it doesn't change the fact that you are a spiritual being. You'll eventually need to have your spiritual drink. Spending time in His presence. And oh how I've been longing for it.
Ko Iie delivered a message which was what I really needed, about letting God be God. It took a lot of pressure off me. I didn't realize all this was piling up on me, but it did.
And the extra testimony he delivered in the end... I somehow felt God moved him to share it for my sake. And perhaps some others. But I really needed that.
There was a lot of crying involved justnow. People all around are crying for heaven knows why, but I had my own reasons. And it felt good to let it ALL out. I seldom cry, even when I wanted to. So it felt good.
Anyway. I met Ko Iie's girlfriend and she was awesome. Her name is Ce Silvi. Talked to her for a bit, she's so cool. In that short talk, I learnt a lot. Full approval from this kid, not that they need any.
So we had dinner and what not afterwards, and yeah. I was still tired physically. Crying is tiring, you know. And when you're physically tired it affects you mentally. I actually took a Rp500,- coin to pay my stuff, thinking it was a dollar coin. Brilliant.
Anyway. That was today. I'll try to go to bed early.
Happy easter everyone!
2
Joe had a rough childhood.
He was the sixth out of eight children. They were not a wealthy family.
His dad worked 3 jobs to support them, his wife helping him.
Joe's dad was a hard man. Like Joe, he had a rough life, if not worse. It resulted in stiffness, difficulties in expressing feelings. They weren't the mushy mushy love type. No time for that.
Love is discipline. Love is education. Love is instilling the correct moral values, by whatever means. Love is making sure you grow to be a better man, to live a better life. If love needs to be harsh, so be it. If beatings are needed, so be it. Even if you don't feel so at the moment, believe me, I'm doing this for your good. You'll thank me in the far future.
This is love.
If Joe did anything wrong, the punishments would be severe. Dad would tie his hands and feet, and uses a broom to beat him up. Probably a cane at other times, for variation. With his limbs tied up, the best that Joe could do was roll around, which doesn't help much when your dad is one angry healthy man.
How could little Joe understand that that was love? It instilled fear in Joe. His relationship with his father wasn't warm. It was fear based. It's not that he hates his father. The whole family knows that each of them love each other. It was just that it was never publicly expressed. That was childhood as Joe knew it.
Joe's parents made enough money for him to go to school, and little Joe didn't take that for granted. He walked 6 km to school everyday and another 6 going home, which makes it some 12 km on foot. There was this one night that Joe stayed up pretty late with his siblings, playing a few rounds of this new card game that his eldest brother, Ronnie, brought from town. He woke up a little late the next morning and stole a neighbor's bike to get him to school. He paid the price later that day. A few rounds of beatings.
A rough childhood made Joe a tough man, a man that can't be taken down easily. A man that takes chances, even spontaneous in a way. He didn't bow down to his situation of lack. He had the drive to make changes to his life.
At 16, Joe had worked several jobs. He delivered papers. He worked in a gas station. He was a plumber. He's worked in a mining company. He's worked all over the place.
The turning point of his life happened when he worked in this company that was willing to pay his college fees. Maybe they saw potential in him, or that hardworking attitude of his, or that drive oozing out of him. Either way, off he went to Canada, earned his diploma, came back and worked for the company for a few years.
Now with a diploma in hand, he was able to work some better paying jobs. He changed jobs a few times, until finally, at 24, he went overseas to try his luck. He left with high hopes of earning a better income, or heaven knows, probably even start his own business!
It wasn't easy, but after some long years of hard work, eventually he made it. Now he owns his own mining company. It wasn't huge, but good enough to make him live an adequate life.
When he married Carah, he was able to support both of them with no major issues. He was even able to support his mom too. His hard work paid off. Money was no longer as big a problem as it was.
***
Alex, three weeks old now, is in his arms.
For that brief moment, life felt complete. Joe promised himself that he would never let Alex have the childhood he had. He's got money now. Alex will live a better life. That was enough reason for him to die in peace, though not just yet.
Alex opened her sleepy eyes and looked at him as if she knew that Joe was currently experiencing this burst of emotions. Joe smiled at her. He loves this baby more than anyone he has ever known, probably including Carah. He would give up anything for Alex. He loves her. Period.
But the form of love he had always known was discipline. Love was education. Love was punishment.
If love needed to be harsh, if beatings were needed.. So be it.
That was love.
Alex closed her eyes, drooled, and went back to dreamland shortly.
He was the sixth out of eight children. They were not a wealthy family.
His dad worked 3 jobs to support them, his wife helping him.
Joe's dad was a hard man. Like Joe, he had a rough life, if not worse. It resulted in stiffness, difficulties in expressing feelings. They weren't the mushy mushy love type. No time for that.
Love is discipline. Love is education. Love is instilling the correct moral values, by whatever means. Love is making sure you grow to be a better man, to live a better life. If love needs to be harsh, so be it. If beatings are needed, so be it. Even if you don't feel so at the moment, believe me, I'm doing this for your good. You'll thank me in the far future.
This is love.
If Joe did anything wrong, the punishments would be severe. Dad would tie his hands and feet, and uses a broom to beat him up. Probably a cane at other times, for variation. With his limbs tied up, the best that Joe could do was roll around, which doesn't help much when your dad is one angry healthy man.
How could little Joe understand that that was love? It instilled fear in Joe. His relationship with his father wasn't warm. It was fear based. It's not that he hates his father. The whole family knows that each of them love each other. It was just that it was never publicly expressed. That was childhood as Joe knew it.
Joe's parents made enough money for him to go to school, and little Joe didn't take that for granted. He walked 6 km to school everyday and another 6 going home, which makes it some 12 km on foot. There was this one night that Joe stayed up pretty late with his siblings, playing a few rounds of this new card game that his eldest brother, Ronnie, brought from town. He woke up a little late the next morning and stole a neighbor's bike to get him to school. He paid the price later that day. A few rounds of beatings.
A rough childhood made Joe a tough man, a man that can't be taken down easily. A man that takes chances, even spontaneous in a way. He didn't bow down to his situation of lack. He had the drive to make changes to his life.
At 16, Joe had worked several jobs. He delivered papers. He worked in a gas station. He was a plumber. He's worked in a mining company. He's worked all over the place.
The turning point of his life happened when he worked in this company that was willing to pay his college fees. Maybe they saw potential in him, or that hardworking attitude of his, or that drive oozing out of him. Either way, off he went to Canada, earned his diploma, came back and worked for the company for a few years.
Now with a diploma in hand, he was able to work some better paying jobs. He changed jobs a few times, until finally, at 24, he went overseas to try his luck. He left with high hopes of earning a better income, or heaven knows, probably even start his own business!
It wasn't easy, but after some long years of hard work, eventually he made it. Now he owns his own mining company. It wasn't huge, but good enough to make him live an adequate life.
When he married Carah, he was able to support both of them with no major issues. He was even able to support his mom too. His hard work paid off. Money was no longer as big a problem as it was.
***
Alex, three weeks old now, is in his arms.
For that brief moment, life felt complete. Joe promised himself that he would never let Alex have the childhood he had. He's got money now. Alex will live a better life. That was enough reason for him to die in peace, though not just yet.
Alex opened her sleepy eyes and looked at him as if she knew that Joe was currently experiencing this burst of emotions. Joe smiled at her. He loves this baby more than anyone he has ever known, probably including Carah. He would give up anything for Alex. He loves her. Period.
But the form of love he had always known was discipline. Love was education. Love was punishment.
If love needed to be harsh, if beatings were needed.. So be it.
That was love.
Alex closed her eyes, drooled, and went back to dreamland shortly.
Strangers
Everyone is a stranger to begin with.
My current mom was a stranger before. I met her in a piano course classroom.
C Joan was a stranger back then. I spent 19 years of my life oblivious of her existence. Yet in some short 2 years she kinda flipped my life.
Everyone in TLG was a stranger. I remembered the first day I shook hands and introduced myself to C Oya, C Manda, C Kenny, Mikey, Christine, Mardian, Ria, Ko Willy, Anes..
Even Ghon was a stranger. Rewind back 6 years and I would have no idea who she was.
Even her name is weird.
Come to think of it, all your friends were once just some strangers. It's just that some go away, some stay and change your life.
It's funny to think that my future husband might also be a stranger to me today.
Life. Interesting as can be.
My current mom was a stranger before. I met her in a piano course classroom.
C Joan was a stranger back then. I spent 19 years of my life oblivious of her existence. Yet in some short 2 years she kinda flipped my life.
Everyone in TLG was a stranger. I remembered the first day I shook hands and introduced myself to C Oya, C Manda, C Kenny, Mikey, Christine, Mardian, Ria, Ko Willy, Anes..
Even Ghon was a stranger. Rewind back 6 years and I would have no idea who she was.
Even her name is weird.
Come to think of it, all your friends were once just some strangers. It's just that some go away, some stay and change your life.
It's funny to think that my future husband might also be a stranger to me today.
Life. Interesting as can be.
Day 19 - Disrespecting your parents.
How am I supposed to talk about this?
Haiyah. I'm not the chim deep type that thinks about these kind of stuff. But lets give it a try.
Why would children be disrespectful?
I don't know. Wrong bringing up? Culture? Parents had no charisma? Media?
Are there parents to be blamed?
I guess so, more or less. Maybe not blame lah, but I believe parents carry a major influence in the person their child grow up to be. They plant the earliest values and principals of life. So if your children didn't turn out how you wanted them to be, I do believe you are part of the reason, in varying degrees. But sometimes parents are just clueless about parenting, so it is very understandable. Love them too much they become spoiled. Be too strict they hate you. Best is ask God for wisdom lah.
What are forms of disrespect?
It ranges. From not greeting when meeting to calling them names to probably killing them?
Do I disrespect my parents?
I would like to think I don't.
Did I ever disrespect my parents?
Yes, they claim, according to my memory.
How?
Not greeting them. Calling them names. (Let me explain. I called my mom "jie" jokingly and she got so mad. And I called my dad "gorilla", "hulk", "king kong" and all other type of huge creatures in front of everyone except him. In my defense, he scolded and beat me a lot and therefore I really disliked him back then. And I was a kid.) But no, I didn't kill them.
Should children respect their parents?
Yes.
How?
Greet them, don't call them names, and don't kill them. Hahaha!
But okay. I think different people show their respect differently. But generally, in parents context, I think respect comes naturally out of love. So, I don't know. Give them what they deserve, put them in their position: As someone who brought you into this world, and sacrificed a lot of things to bring you up. Give them money when you have your earning. Spend time with them. Don't be ashamed of them. I don't know.
Anyway. Point is. Respect your parents. Don't fear them, respect them. What's the difference? Think for yourself!
Good night!
Haiyah. I'm not the chim deep type that thinks about these kind of stuff. But lets give it a try.
Why would children be disrespectful?
I don't know. Wrong bringing up? Culture? Parents had no charisma? Media?
Are there parents to be blamed?
I guess so, more or less. Maybe not blame lah, but I believe parents carry a major influence in the person their child grow up to be. They plant the earliest values and principals of life. So if your children didn't turn out how you wanted them to be, I do believe you are part of the reason, in varying degrees. But sometimes parents are just clueless about parenting, so it is very understandable. Love them too much they become spoiled. Be too strict they hate you. Best is ask God for wisdom lah.
What are forms of disrespect?
It ranges. From not greeting when meeting to calling them names to probably killing them?
Do I disrespect my parents?
I would like to think I don't.
Did I ever disrespect my parents?
Yes, they claim, according to my memory.
How?
Not greeting them. Calling them names. (Let me explain. I called my mom "jie" jokingly and she got so mad. And I called my dad "gorilla", "hulk", "king kong" and all other type of huge creatures in front of everyone except him. In my defense, he scolded and beat me a lot and therefore I really disliked him back then. And I was a kid.) But no, I didn't kill them.
Should children respect their parents?
Yes.
How?
Greet them, don't call them names, and don't kill them. Hahaha!
But okay. I think different people show their respect differently. But generally, in parents context, I think respect comes naturally out of love. So, I don't know. Give them what they deserve, put them in their position: As someone who brought you into this world, and sacrificed a lot of things to bring you up. Give them money when you have your earning. Spend time with them. Don't be ashamed of them. I don't know.
Anyway. Point is. Respect your parents. Don't fear them, respect them. What's the difference? Think for yourself!
Good night!
Kata seorang pendeta, kalo perasaan wes gak ada kata2 yang bisa menggambarkan.. Just a groan will reach the Throne..
Keluarno iphone.. Buka Bible.. Kadang lek wes gak kepikiran mau yaapa lagi, emosi wes kyk mencret mau mbledhos, bnr2 lah lek wes gak isa apa2.. Walau susa, liak Tuhan.. Paksa! Bnr2 mek Tuhan.
Keluarno iphone.. Buka Bible.. Kadang lek wes gak kepikiran mau yaapa lagi, emosi wes kyk mencret mau mbledhos, bnr2 lah lek wes gak isa apa2.. Walau susa, liak Tuhan.. Paksa! Bnr2 mek Tuhan.
Day 18 - Your beliefs. (Part 4)
Follow the journey!
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
9. Grace.
So in the last post I left you with a question on what changed my relationship with God. In a good way, that is.
And I bet most of you got it right.
It is Grace.
Ce Joan was the one who first spoke to me about grace. (previously I wrote 'thought' instead of 'spoke to', but then I changed my mind. The revelation of grace, or anything of what God is, needs to be done by the Holy Spirit. You can't teach someone on what God is like. He has to reveal it by Himself) And I'm glad she did. The revelation of grace changed my life.
What is grace? It is God's unmerited favor. When you receive something you do not deserve, that's grace.
When you work in a company, you get paid. That's not grace, you earned your payment. But if one day your boss decides to give you a ferrari out of the blue, now that's grace. You did nothing to earn the ferrari. What you deserve is your salary, not the ferrari. The ferrari is simply out of your boss' kindness, out of his grace.
And that's everything about my (our, supposedly) life now!
Salvation is grace. You did not earn your salvation. No amount of good work can reserve you a spot in heaven. God's standard is, if you fail to fulfill just one speck of His law, you've failed all of them. No tolerance. That's how just and perfect His law is.
If you are in your right mind, you should know that we all fail. No matter how much money you give to the charity, no matter how much time and energy you spend on social work, travelling the world to spread the gospel.. Just one lie, one anger, one complaint, one gossip, one lustful thought, one hatred, and all your good works just crumbles down in the sight of God. Just like that.
Now, the only Person who has the capacity to perfectly fulfill the law was God Himself. Duh, He was the One who made it. So He came down to the earth He created in the form of Jesus Christ. God in human flesh. Fully God, fully man. So basically He fulfilled the law flawlessly, leaving God the Father delightfully satisfied.
You see, according to the law, you need to have an animal sacrifice made to God to cover your sin.
Hebrews 9:22b says: "For without the shedding of blood, there is no forgiveness."
If you read the book of Leviticus, you can see all the criteria of an animal sacrifice. The animal HAS to be spotless (which by the way represents Jesus).
So, how the sacrifice works is the animal will die for your sin. Your sin will be transferred to the animal by some head touching ritual involving the priest, and the 'righteousness' of the spotless animal will be transferred to you. That's how the blood of the animal covers your sin. And I'm not just crap talking, it's all in the Bible. Go read Leviticus 4, and basically the rest of Leviticus for more types of offerings.
So why aren't we doing it anymore now? Because, when Jesus died, He was the perfect offering. The blood of imperfect animals isn't able to remove your sin, it can only cover it for so long. But Jesus' blood is perfect. He's the perfect offering, therefore He only need to die once, and that is it. No more excess blood is needed.
And the way to salvation, is through Him alone. It isn't Jesus plus good works, or Jesus plus fasting, or Jesus plus diligent praying.. Salvation is Jesus, period. It doesn't depend on you, it depends on Him and His perfection and His finished work.
Now think about this. If your salvation doesn't depend on you and your good work, what makes you think that any of your bad works could make you lose it?
This completely set me free. Gone are the days of worrying that I might still go to hell. And that completely changed my relationship with God! Instead of being scared of His wrath, I became aware of His love. And living life knowing that you are unconditionally loved is the best way to live, man.
Reading stuff like this, people will come up with ideas that grace is licence to sin. Lets be real. With or without grace, you will still sin. So what difference does a 'licence' make? Sin is wrong. But knowing that when I sin, God still loves me and that I will still go to heaven changes everything.
Having been loved like that, I don't want to sin. I don't want to sin not because I'm trying to earn points with God so He would give me a pass to heaven, but because I love Jesus and I don't want to make Him sad. But of course I still fail here and there lah. My point here: if you're not completely sure that all your sins are forgiven, you can't be completely be assured that God loves you, and therefore, hinders you from being able to love Him back effortlessly.
And grace doesn't mean then that good works are irrelevant. It still is! But the difference is, you bless others because you know you are already blessed, not to earn blessing, or salvation. If you know how blessed you are, you can't help but bless others. If you know how loved you are, you can't help but love others. And these type of effortless "good works", IMO is the best.
That alone changed my take on Christianity. I can't pin point exactly when my walk with God started to change, but after some time, I realized I was no longer dragging anything. Life became so light, and walking with God became so natural.
Of course there were still days where I felt hungry. But that's it, hungry. Not dry. Sometimes our relationship still can get a little flat. But it was different from the pre-grace days. Though flat, but in the back of my head, somewhere deep in my heart, I know He's still madly in love with me. That revelation is default. It's just that sometimes I was distracted, or not eating enough of His word.
Not once in these 3 years after I known grace that my walk was ever dry. Flat, but never dry. Never crying to The Lord wondering where He went, or what went wrong.. He's always near, and no matter what went wrong, again, it doesn't depend on me anymore. He will always be here :)
And grace doesn't stop at salvation. It continues on. I'm living a ife showered with God's grace all the time. I've received blessings I know I don't deserve. I can go on and on about it, as well as my fellas who also knows they are under grace. I've been hearing testimonies over testimonies of how amazing God's grace is in their lives.. Grace has and will always be there. It's just the matter of you knowing it or not, you having a revelation about it.
Lately, I've been hearing a lot of grace testimonies about job searching. It comes non stop! And the most recent: FA Project. We are all blown away. When we need more people, they came overflowingly. When we need food, suddenly it's there. When we need participation from the kids, we got the best audience ever. They are amazing. God is amazing.
So, to give you a foundation to hold on to, here are some bible verses that helped me see grace when I was off focus.
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12:9
And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.
2 Corinthians 9:8
So yeah. I have an awesome walk with God, and it has never been boring.
Why is grace so important? Cos Jesus was full of grace. He embodied grace. He is grace. Same goes, He is love. He is wisdom. He is healing. He is provision. He IS!
And so this is my story. It is personal, nothing set on stone.
Please don't take this story and make it a formula for having a closer relationship with God. A walk with God has no formulas. He is personal. Ask for your own, and it will be awesome!
So, enjoy your day (or night) people!
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
9. Grace.
So in the last post I left you with a question on what changed my relationship with God. In a good way, that is.
And I bet most of you got it right.
It is Grace.
Ce Joan was the one who first spoke to me about grace. (previously I wrote 'thought' instead of 'spoke to', but then I changed my mind. The revelation of grace, or anything of what God is, needs to be done by the Holy Spirit. You can't teach someone on what God is like. He has to reveal it by Himself) And I'm glad she did. The revelation of grace changed my life.
What is grace? It is God's unmerited favor. When you receive something you do not deserve, that's grace.
When you work in a company, you get paid. That's not grace, you earned your payment. But if one day your boss decides to give you a ferrari out of the blue, now that's grace. You did nothing to earn the ferrari. What you deserve is your salary, not the ferrari. The ferrari is simply out of your boss' kindness, out of his grace.
And that's everything about my (our, supposedly) life now!
Salvation is grace. You did not earn your salvation. No amount of good work can reserve you a spot in heaven. God's standard is, if you fail to fulfill just one speck of His law, you've failed all of them. No tolerance. That's how just and perfect His law is.
If you are in your right mind, you should know that we all fail. No matter how much money you give to the charity, no matter how much time and energy you spend on social work, travelling the world to spread the gospel.. Just one lie, one anger, one complaint, one gossip, one lustful thought, one hatred, and all your good works just crumbles down in the sight of God. Just like that.
Now, the only Person who has the capacity to perfectly fulfill the law was God Himself. Duh, He was the One who made it. So He came down to the earth He created in the form of Jesus Christ. God in human flesh. Fully God, fully man. So basically He fulfilled the law flawlessly, leaving God the Father delightfully satisfied.
You see, according to the law, you need to have an animal sacrifice made to God to cover your sin.
Hebrews 9:22b says: "For without the shedding of blood, there is no forgiveness."
If you read the book of Leviticus, you can see all the criteria of an animal sacrifice. The animal HAS to be spotless (which by the way represents Jesus).
So, how the sacrifice works is the animal will die for your sin. Your sin will be transferred to the animal by some head touching ritual involving the priest, and the 'righteousness' of the spotless animal will be transferred to you. That's how the blood of the animal covers your sin. And I'm not just crap talking, it's all in the Bible. Go read Leviticus 4, and basically the rest of Leviticus for more types of offerings.
So why aren't we doing it anymore now? Because, when Jesus died, He was the perfect offering. The blood of imperfect animals isn't able to remove your sin, it can only cover it for so long. But Jesus' blood is perfect. He's the perfect offering, therefore He only need to die once, and that is it. No more excess blood is needed.
And the way to salvation, is through Him alone. It isn't Jesus plus good works, or Jesus plus fasting, or Jesus plus diligent praying.. Salvation is Jesus, period. It doesn't depend on you, it depends on Him and His perfection and His finished work.
Now think about this. If your salvation doesn't depend on you and your good work, what makes you think that any of your bad works could make you lose it?
This completely set me free. Gone are the days of worrying that I might still go to hell. And that completely changed my relationship with God! Instead of being scared of His wrath, I became aware of His love. And living life knowing that you are unconditionally loved is the best way to live, man.
Reading stuff like this, people will come up with ideas that grace is licence to sin. Lets be real. With or without grace, you will still sin. So what difference does a 'licence' make? Sin is wrong. But knowing that when I sin, God still loves me and that I will still go to heaven changes everything.
Having been loved like that, I don't want to sin. I don't want to sin not because I'm trying to earn points with God so He would give me a pass to heaven, but because I love Jesus and I don't want to make Him sad. But of course I still fail here and there lah. My point here: if you're not completely sure that all your sins are forgiven, you can't be completely be assured that God loves you, and therefore, hinders you from being able to love Him back effortlessly.
And grace doesn't mean then that good works are irrelevant. It still is! But the difference is, you bless others because you know you are already blessed, not to earn blessing, or salvation. If you know how blessed you are, you can't help but bless others. If you know how loved you are, you can't help but love others. And these type of effortless "good works", IMO is the best.
That alone changed my take on Christianity. I can't pin point exactly when my walk with God started to change, but after some time, I realized I was no longer dragging anything. Life became so light, and walking with God became so natural.
Of course there were still days where I felt hungry. But that's it, hungry. Not dry. Sometimes our relationship still can get a little flat. But it was different from the pre-grace days. Though flat, but in the back of my head, somewhere deep in my heart, I know He's still madly in love with me. That revelation is default. It's just that sometimes I was distracted, or not eating enough of His word.
Not once in these 3 years after I known grace that my walk was ever dry. Flat, but never dry. Never crying to The Lord wondering where He went, or what went wrong.. He's always near, and no matter what went wrong, again, it doesn't depend on me anymore. He will always be here :)
And grace doesn't stop at salvation. It continues on. I'm living a ife showered with God's grace all the time. I've received blessings I know I don't deserve. I can go on and on about it, as well as my fellas who also knows they are under grace. I've been hearing testimonies over testimonies of how amazing God's grace is in their lives.. Grace has and will always be there. It's just the matter of you knowing it or not, you having a revelation about it.
Lately, I've been hearing a lot of grace testimonies about job searching. It comes non stop! And the most recent: FA Project. We are all blown away. When we need more people, they came overflowingly. When we need food, suddenly it's there. When we need participation from the kids, we got the best audience ever. They are amazing. God is amazing.
So, to give you a foundation to hold on to, here are some bible verses that helped me see grace when I was off focus.
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12:9
And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.
2 Corinthians 9:8
So yeah. I have an awesome walk with God, and it has never been boring.
Why is grace so important? Cos Jesus was full of grace. He embodied grace. He is grace. Same goes, He is love. He is wisdom. He is healing. He is provision. He IS!
And so this is my story. It is personal, nothing set on stone.
Please don't take this story and make it a formula for having a closer relationship with God. A walk with God has no formulas. He is personal. Ask for your own, and it will be awesome!
So, enjoy your day (or night) people!
So when he left, I talked to God.
I told Him that He knows I would need someone to take his position.
Not his replacement, mind you. He will never be replaced.
But he'll leave an empty spot here in Singapore.
Lets be real, distance matters.
You can't have lunch and skype someone for accompany. You need someone present.
So God hears. It's been over a year, and yes, He's answered.
Funny thing is, he (the one who left) had already predicted who his 'replacement' is gonna be, over a year ago. And he was right. Amusing, huh?
Anyway. I'm a grateful girl.
Good night!
I told Him that He knows I would need someone to take his position.
Not his replacement, mind you. He will never be replaced.
But he'll leave an empty spot here in Singapore.
Lets be real, distance matters.
You can't have lunch and skype someone for accompany. You need someone present.
So God hears. It's been over a year, and yes, He's answered.
Funny thing is, he (the one who left) had already predicted who his 'replacement' is gonna be, over a year ago. And he was right. Amusing, huh?
Anyway. I'm a grateful girl.
Good night!
Just came back from FA.
It was packed! God kept sending kids to Sekia, and I'm so thankful!
For a person like me, I feel I do take some time to get to know someone closely. And it is overwhelming, the number of kids! I just got to know some of the older kids better and someone new comes along. Got to know her a bit, another pack comes. It's just amazing. Somemore after FA Project. Wow.
And I love it when people share their stories. Love listening to them. And this is a fairly new habit I picked up. Back then, I didn't know how listening to people can be so enjoyable. But it is.
Am I a good listener? I do hope so, but I honestly don't know. I just like it when people share.
And I really want to be more organized. I know I am messy here and there, and sometimes it causes other people trouble. And sometimes I know I am to blame, and it's not a good feeling. But no point beating myself up for it. I'll just try to be better and improve.
So now that that's out of my heart, I can sleep in peace.
And I finally got to watch Safe Haven. Stoked.
Good night!
For a person like me, I feel I do take some time to get to know someone closely. And it is overwhelming, the number of kids! I just got to know some of the older kids better and someone new comes along. Got to know her a bit, another pack comes. It's just amazing. Somemore after FA Project. Wow.
And I love it when people share their stories. Love listening to them. And this is a fairly new habit I picked up. Back then, I didn't know how listening to people can be so enjoyable. But it is.
Am I a good listener? I do hope so, but I honestly don't know. I just like it when people share.
And I really want to be more organized. I know I am messy here and there, and sometimes it causes other people trouble. And sometimes I know I am to blame, and it's not a good feeling. But no point beating myself up for it. I'll just try to be better and improve.
So now that that's out of my heart, I can sleep in peace.
And I finally got to watch Safe Haven. Stoked.
Good night!
Mom and Dad.
Talked to Ko Willy about how I was so upset of the crusade. Now I'm fine and it doesn't bother me anymore, but yeah, I talked to him on how I felt it has wasted my time.
And he said that it's not wasted, cos I found out that I didn't enjoy it, and therefore I don't need to come the next time around.
And it made sense. Wise wise words.
It's amazing how Ko Willy and Ce Joan are together. They both are already awesome just by themselves. Whole, complete, wise individuals who is in love with Jesus. Put them together and you get the baddest couple I've ever known. And I meant that in a urban positive way.
The fact that they attract each other a bit mindblowing. I can't see Ce Joan with any other guy. She's so cool, she is such a leader, full of charisma and wisdom. She deals with problems, she's independent.
Talk to her and you'll know she's not "just another girl." IMO, it is gonna be so hard to win her heart over. And I really feel no other man besides Ko Willy is capable of doing that. Sorry to all Adams who's fell for her before. Just my opinion.
And Ko Willy as well. I am sincerely and honestly blessed that he was the one who mentored me as a singer. He is just like a toned down male version of Ce Joan. They are same, in a sense that he always knows what to say, or shall I say it, wise. He also has that charisma, you can't help but to respect him. What he says carries weight.
Sometimes I would talk to Ghon about couples, and sometimes we would feel that some relationships are imbalance. Either Jesus isn't the center, or one isn't mature or whole enough yet. But seriously, to the readers, our opinions doesn't matter. If you are in a relationship and happy, don't worry of whether it is you or not we were talking about, in case I made you wonder. It most probably isn't you anyway.
But Ce Joan and Ko Willy, they are both really daebak man. I'm sure they have their own intimate romantic moment, but from the outside, they are really the epitome of power couple. And by power, I mean POWER. As if they are capable enough to live independently on their own, but still they choose to be with each other. I think they bring the best out of each other.
Both have this vibe of being someone you can talk to, someone that will accept you and won't judge you. Both are gentle, but not soft. Firm, but not harsh. Charisma, but not bossy. Both has impacted my life greatly, both loves God, both practices Grace, both knows they are under Grace, both are wise, and all of them, I must say, pretty equally. Can't choose who's wiser, or more graceful, or more charismatic. Maaayybe Ko Willy is a drop scarier. Teehee Ko if you are reading.
But still they are two different person. Ko Willy can do all sorts of silly cheesy stuff, and I can't imagine Ce Joan doing any too crazy. Ko Willy has the confidence to talk in front of a lot of people, and Ce Joan said she couldn't. But really, I think she's very good. Ce Joan has this art strike in her, so she understands some of my antiqueness.
I just love them both. My great leaders. And really, I don't know why I am suddenly talking about them. I originally wanted to talk about the first three paragraphs only. But oh well.
To the best couple in the world :)
And he said that it's not wasted, cos I found out that I didn't enjoy it, and therefore I don't need to come the next time around.
And it made sense. Wise wise words.
It's amazing how Ko Willy and Ce Joan are together. They both are already awesome just by themselves. Whole, complete, wise individuals who is in love with Jesus. Put them together and you get the baddest couple I've ever known. And I meant that in a urban positive way.
The fact that they attract each other a bit mindblowing. I can't see Ce Joan with any other guy. She's so cool, she is such a leader, full of charisma and wisdom. She deals with problems, she's independent.
Talk to her and you'll know she's not "just another girl." IMO, it is gonna be so hard to win her heart over. And I really feel no other man besides Ko Willy is capable of doing that. Sorry to all Adams who's fell for her before. Just my opinion.
And Ko Willy as well. I am sincerely and honestly blessed that he was the one who mentored me as a singer. He is just like a toned down male version of Ce Joan. They are same, in a sense that he always knows what to say, or shall I say it, wise. He also has that charisma, you can't help but to respect him. What he says carries weight.
Sometimes I would talk to Ghon about couples, and sometimes we would feel that some relationships are imbalance. Either Jesus isn't the center, or one isn't mature or whole enough yet. But seriously, to the readers, our opinions doesn't matter. If you are in a relationship and happy, don't worry of whether it is you or not we were talking about, in case I made you wonder. It most probably isn't you anyway.
But Ce Joan and Ko Willy, they are both really daebak man. I'm sure they have their own intimate romantic moment, but from the outside, they are really the epitome of power couple. And by power, I mean POWER. As if they are capable enough to live independently on their own, but still they choose to be with each other. I think they bring the best out of each other.
Both have this vibe of being someone you can talk to, someone that will accept you and won't judge you. Both are gentle, but not soft. Firm, but not harsh. Charisma, but not bossy. Both has impacted my life greatly, both loves God, both practices Grace, both knows they are under Grace, both are wise, and all of them, I must say, pretty equally. Can't choose who's wiser, or more graceful, or more charismatic. Maaayybe Ko Willy is a drop scarier. Teehee Ko if you are reading.
But still they are two different person. Ko Willy can do all sorts of silly cheesy stuff, and I can't imagine Ce Joan doing any too crazy. Ko Willy has the confidence to talk in front of a lot of people, and Ce Joan said she couldn't. But really, I think she's very good. Ce Joan has this art strike in her, so she understands some of my antiqueness.
I just love them both. My great leaders. And really, I don't know why I am suddenly talking about them. I originally wanted to talk about the first three paragraphs only. But oh well.
To the best couple in the world :)
Maybe I'm just a little upset that I went to this crusade and they reveal nothing of Jesus. Praise and worship was great, but I want Jesus.
I've been to a lot of services and crusades and seminars and cellgroups to learn from experience that all I need is Jesus. No other teachings and laws and theories will stick in my head if it is not about Jesus.
I need Jesus, to know more about Him. That's the sole reason I attend all these things. And when they don't reveal Jesus, I just think it's a serious waste of time.
Sure you can teach love and faith and discipleship and wisdom and all that. But all that comes with Jesus! You know Jesus, you know the rest. Those characteristics when centered on human, is pointless. Know Jesus' love and you will love. Jesus is wisdom. You know how Jesus is powerful and how He lives you, you'll have faith. I may sound fanatic here but it's true, everything IS about Him!
Well in meetings where Sekia or other siblings in Christ are around, I can take it as fellowship, and still be able to tolerate if the message they preach are.... Not nourishing. But a crusade from another church where I know nobody. At Expo. Feel like telling them, gimme back my time man.
So yeah. Schoolwork not done, and I feel I've wasted some 5 precious hours. Thats why I'm in a nasty mood right now.
And I'm blaming noone. All who asked me to come meant well, and I myself wanted to come. I'm just upset. You are a preacher. Why arent you preaching of the One person the whole bible is about??
And I'm not saying I'm all that good at preaching at all. I'm just stating my POV of what I need as a church attendee, as a Christian. Jesus.
Night.
I've been to a lot of services and crusades and seminars and cellgroups to learn from experience that all I need is Jesus. No other teachings and laws and theories will stick in my head if it is not about Jesus.
I need Jesus, to know more about Him. That's the sole reason I attend all these things. And when they don't reveal Jesus, I just think it's a serious waste of time.
Sure you can teach love and faith and discipleship and wisdom and all that. But all that comes with Jesus! You know Jesus, you know the rest. Those characteristics when centered on human, is pointless. Know Jesus' love and you will love. Jesus is wisdom. You know how Jesus is powerful and how He lives you, you'll have faith. I may sound fanatic here but it's true, everything IS about Him!
Well in meetings where Sekia or other siblings in Christ are around, I can take it as fellowship, and still be able to tolerate if the message they preach are.... Not nourishing. But a crusade from another church where I know nobody. At Expo. Feel like telling them, gimme back my time man.
So yeah. Schoolwork not done, and I feel I've wasted some 5 precious hours. Thats why I'm in a nasty mood right now.
And I'm blaming noone. All who asked me to come meant well, and I myself wanted to come. I'm just upset. You are a preacher. Why arent you preaching of the One person the whole bible is about??
And I'm not saying I'm all that good at preaching at all. I'm just stating my POV of what I need as a church attendee, as a Christian. Jesus.
Night.
That friend you can talk about anything to.
We all had our pasts, and some habits die hard. Habits and pasts you are ashamed of.
To have someone you can be vulnerable to, who won't judge when you trip and fall. Someone who knows all these taboos about you and stays the same.
I have that someone. No, in fact, more than one!
How blessed!
We all had our pasts, and some habits die hard. Habits and pasts you are ashamed of.
To have someone you can be vulnerable to, who won't judge when you trip and fall. Someone who knows all these taboos about you and stays the same.
I have that someone. No, in fact, more than one!
How blessed!
So TLG, our youth ministry in church is going to produce a movie!!!
Yes, it's indie, and yes, it's low budget. But yes, I'm stoked.
Being in the design team, I'm excited. Reminds me of how I love this. Hope it will turn out cool!
Then, I found out I am part of the cast as well and really, I'm so happy! I enjoyed Mencari Putri a lot. The practices, the prayers, the meetings, even the scoldings.. It was such an experience! I really enjoyed my time as Panci!
And now, I get to do it again! Aaah.. These gifts from God.. He's the best.
And justnow we had out first meeting and Ko Rai asked us to tell what we think the character of our character was like. And I was dumbfounded.
I've read the script, I know her story, but honestly I've never really thought of my character like that. And Ko Yoga was explaining it fluently and asking questions (that made sense, which shows some smart thinking) and I was like wow.
So I brainstormed quickly and splurred out first thing that came to mind of her and stopped. I was like what on heaven am I talking about. But that really was the only thing that came to my blank mind. Now that I think of it, there's a lot more that I could've said about her.
Then feeling that I've done less then expected, I confided in ce Joan. It's not that I feel condemned or anything. But it was in my mind. I told her how Ko Yoga has 'done his homework' and I was like -.-
She said, isn't Ko Yoga studying PHD?
And that one sentence from her silenced my mini storm. She's such a woman of wisdom. Not only smart, but wise. Smart people cannot say the right thing at the right time all the time. She can. Nearly nailed it every time. That's not human, that's the Holy Spirit.
I guess some people are just smart. Or trained to think. Or like to think.
But either way, Renata, I'll get to know you now.
*shakes hand.
Yes, it's indie, and yes, it's low budget. But yes, I'm stoked.
Being in the design team, I'm excited. Reminds me of how I love this. Hope it will turn out cool!
Then, I found out I am part of the cast as well and really, I'm so happy! I enjoyed Mencari Putri a lot. The practices, the prayers, the meetings, even the scoldings.. It was such an experience! I really enjoyed my time as Panci!
And now, I get to do it again! Aaah.. These gifts from God.. He's the best.
And justnow we had out first meeting and Ko Rai asked us to tell what we think the character of our character was like. And I was dumbfounded.
I've read the script, I know her story, but honestly I've never really thought of my character like that. And Ko Yoga was explaining it fluently and asking questions (that made sense, which shows some smart thinking) and I was like wow.
So I brainstormed quickly and splurred out first thing that came to mind of her and stopped. I was like what on heaven am I talking about. But that really was the only thing that came to my blank mind. Now that I think of it, there's a lot more that I could've said about her.
Then feeling that I've done less then expected, I confided in ce Joan. It's not that I feel condemned or anything. But it was in my mind. I told her how Ko Yoga has 'done his homework' and I was like -.-
She said, isn't Ko Yoga studying PHD?
And that one sentence from her silenced my mini storm. She's such a woman of wisdom. Not only smart, but wise. Smart people cannot say the right thing at the right time all the time. She can. Nearly nailed it every time. That's not human, that's the Holy Spirit.
I guess some people are just smart. Or trained to think. Or like to think.
But either way, Renata, I'll get to know you now.
*shakes hand.
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